and Ten

Some of you might be wondering why I'm under a table, biting my finger and wearing a shirt that says "DEVOLVE." You might also be wondering where the little mouse went with my cheese. I know I am. Why is it that every time you have a conveniently small piece of cheese, and you put it on the floor for safe keeping, a mouse always takes it? It's another one of those unsolved mysteries in the world like "who made the pyramids," "why did Elvis pretend his was dead to open a burger place in Michigan," or "why does my hand smell different every time I sniff it?" We may never know all those things but what I do know is that this shirt is in tribute to the band Devo from the early 80's. They sing that famous "Whip It" song. I'm not referring to those Cool Whip Topping cans that you spray in your mouth every 5.38574 minutes aunt Hilda, so don't get too excited. Your heart is already under too much pressure.
I'm under the table for two reasons. The first reason is that everyone knows the most attractive place a gal can find a guy when the floor is covered in expired milk is under a table. So, you attractive ladies out there that like what ya see, speak up. The second reason is that it was raining outside. No I'm not afraid of lighting. I was just under there in case anyone else was afraid of lighting wanted to have a friend to talk to. Last time I checked that was a nice and considerate thing for me to do. The panda at the zoo knows what I'm talking about. It is it's own reward but occasionally I find a not so clean penny and then it all becomes worth it. So I'll be here under the table while it's raining and I'll talk to you non-wooden puppet people tomorrow. Remember to tell your friends about Shirt-culation... unless your friend is a relative of mine. In that case don't.