Fifsteen

I would like to first and foremost point out that I do not, and never have, watched that show Jersey Shore! I do watch re-runs of Reading Rainbow, The Price is Right, and Franny The Funny Falcon though. That last one hasn't actually aired yet. It's more of just a show that I watch in my mind when I'm tired of listening to the neighbor's cat, which happens a lot surprisingly. Franny the funny falcon is always found in odd places. In the last episode she ran into a building and fell onto a sleeping mime. Then her clever little woodland friend, the Piggy Pigenstein who's the pig version of Frankenstein, popped out of the wicker basket and said "Oh, you funny little falcon." Pretty much every episode ends with a mime getting hurt. Rumor has it that there was an never aired episode that featured a mime screaming before it got ran over by a little girl on a pink bike. If any of you know network executives that want to make Franny The Funny Falcon into a show, let them know that I'm open to offers. Such offers may include, but are not limited to, a pinball machine that gives gum balls instead of tickets, one shoe made entirely from clear plastic and/or a water balloon that can't pop no matter how many little kids you throw it at.
Back to the shirt. You should know that this is what it mostly looks like under neath the shirt, give or take the muscle definitions. You should also know that licking the nearest electrical outlet may cause sudden awesomeness to run through your body...