Being slapped by an earless elephant after being chased by a cop car full of monkeys with knives duct taped to their hands is not the best way to die. In order for it to be the best way to die, the monkeys would have had to be spray painted different colors by other monkeys. Make sure it's not a human that spray paints them because that'll just ruin the whole thing, and trust me, you can tell the difference when it happens to you. You wouldn't want your last thought to be "Dang those monkeys weren't painted by monkeys! NOOOO!" That was the fatal mistake in my uncle Roberto's death. He had it all planned out so well too. He should have gone with his backup plan which actually happened to be death by Chuck Norris. Chuck, at the time, wouldn't do it cuz my uncle had a thick beard, and it's a known fact that Chuck doesn't kill other beardians. The loop hole in that rule has to do with what stuffed animal they sleep with at night. Make sure you bearded men and women out there sleep with stuffed ducks that have painted on beards. If not, you may get Chuck Norrised.
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